What happens when we begin again?
by Alison Bonds Shapiro, M.B.A. in Healing Into Possibility
Originally published online by Psychology Today
The hardest thing I have ever had to do is to let go of what has happened and begin again. Whether it was the fear that my body experienced when deeply injured or the grief that came from seeing the way my actions or inactions caused harm to someone else or the forgiveness of the harm that has come to me or the searing experience of the death of someone I loved, being willing to meet what has happened and find a way to live with it and move on has not been easy. I want to cling to my rage or my embarrassment or my grief. It is what I know. To let that go is to experience without reservation the awful the truth of what has happened and the realization of the uncertainty that lies beneath it. Beginning again has long seemed to me to be very difficult work.
Over the years I have learned that there is another way to think about beginning again – a way that, while it may be difficult, is rich in possibilities. Frank Ostaseski, founder of the The Metta Institute, describes beginning again as “the kindest choice”. Is that possible? Is beginning again kind? Where would the kindness come from? To whom are we being kind? Ourselves? Someone else?
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